34 Gallery Poet Trust Boma

Poetry, literature in general, has always been my cup of tea. Growing up in a suburban area of Malawi, I was a vibrant young boy with the demeanor to wow the crowd. But all of that changed in the summer of 2017, when my family filed for bankruptcy. To me, it wasn’t just about money, it was about isolation. I had to stop going to school, and we moved to a new location to “start fresh.” That was the birth of my social anxiety and pariah status, though I wouldn’t have admitted it back then.

After that, I withdrew indoors and built an emotional shield because the pain was too much. My mom was always working to provide, while my stepdad wasn’t really the hero of the century. My brother suffers from autism, and in that same year, my younger sister passed away. It broke me. I have never felt so alone, and to this day, regardless of how many friends surround me, I often still feel the same. 

To say the least, I practically never grew. Sometimes the pain is such that when someone tries to come close, I push them as far as possible. My work (Winds roots and stories.) stands to tell the story of being present without being seen. More so it speaks on the theme of Stillness as the pause and reflection of life when you see what truly matters, and maybe that is what we all need. 

And that brings me to my process. I usually write when life is not giving, when I am feeling too much. As sad as it sounds, writing became my form of escapism. I created the character “Brandon” so that I wouldn’t have to feel everything myself. Instead, he could feel it for me. It wasn’t a stroke of genius, but more of a natural, adaptive measure, a way to hide the sinking feeling. Yet through it, I found relief. And in writing, I feel better. I can continue to where the mask without exploding out of my mind. Isn’t that why we all do what we do? I decided to share that which works for me, not because of the recognition, but because I know its not only about me but someone somewhere could see through my lens and get the bigger picture.

I usually write when life is not giving, when I am feeling too much. As sad as it sounds, writing became my form of escapism. I created the character “Brandon” so that I wouldn’t have to feel everything myself. Instead, he could feel it for me. It wasn’t a stroke of genius, but more of a natural, adaptive measure, a way to hide the sinking feeling. Yet through it, I found relief. 

And in writing, I feel better. I can continue to where the mask without exploding out of my mind. Isn’t that why we all do what we do? I decided to share that which works for me, not because of the recognition, but because I know its not only about me but someone somewhere could see through my lens and get the bigger picture.